So this was meant to be Snoop Dogg but there wasn't much time and effort involved, so it looks more like his second cousin or something...will try harder next time!
I guess the explanation is that my metabolism catches up with me, and my weight increases in tandem with alcohol consumption and gambling.. but 4 limbs intact, get in there!
Well, it says worst case scenario so I went all out..
I have lost my arms and legs in a freak ice cream truck accident, and I am also chronically obese. I am a maths teacher working at a private boys' school and my students make fun of me every day and don't learn anything. I have this job because by 2022, all schools must employ racial minorities and disabled people so that young people don't think they're freaks (I tick all the boxes), but I'm not technically qualified so I live off my measly benefits. Also, I am incontinent, so I will shit myself every so often and a student will have to fetch someone to wheel me away and clean me up. Oh, and no one loves me.
Don't even ask me how I wrote on the chalkboard, someone probably did it for me before the lesson